Monday, May 18, 2009

Movie Monday - Creepy Cupids, Boring Bigfoots & Mega Monsters!


Valentine (2001)

[Denise Richards, David Boreanaz, Marley Shelton, Jessica Capshaw]

I saw this horror flick a few years back, and it had only made a vague impression on me then, so I decided to rewatch it.

The movie isn't really 'scary'. It has an okay mystery, as to "who is the killer?" But it also has some sort of subtext about women and the crappy men they deal with. Of course, the movie is FILLED with jerk males, so I am unsure if they actually knew how to express whatever point it is they were trying to make.

As for the horror aspects, I wasn't thrilled. There were some different kills here, but I was more bored than scared. Might be a better flick for a casual horror movie fan than for someone who sees a lot of these types of films.

Not awesome, but not totally crap either. More like a 'nothing-else-good-is-on-let's-watch-this' type of movie.


Clawed: The Legend of Sasquatch (2005) (also known as The Unknown)

[Dylan Purcell, Brandon Henschel, Miles O'Keeffe]

I was eager to watch this, mainly because I was all pumped up after viewing the trailer for "Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus". I guess I needed a good "cheesy monster flick" fix, and this seemed to fit the bill.

Nope. I was sadly mistaken. This was bad, and not in a good way. It plays more like a "young adult" version of a Bigfoot story. The monster is only barely seen until the end, and the characters here are all just stereotypes. There is the smart yet unpopular teen, the jock who is an ass, a "wise" Native American who 'knows' things about the Sasquatch, and the ignorant rednecks who shoot first and don't care why.

I knew I was watching crud when this line was spoken, and I quote: "We may be dumb, but we ain't stupid."

Well, your movie is both. Avoid it.


The Incredible Hulk (2008)

[Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth, William Hurt]

So, I have never seen Ang Lee's Hulk, so I cannot compare that one to this updated version. That said, this version was good. It fulfills what it sets out to be, and that is a mega comic book movie.

All four leads are great in their roles, truly bringing the characters to life. I also loved the homages to the 70s "Incredible Hulk" television show, which was my favorite version of the character.

Also liked all the nods to other Marvel-universe characters or story, especially the end scene. Very cool, and definitely a good way to keep your core-fans happy. Marvel sure as heck knows their fan base.

Good movie, if you like comic books or action flicks.



  1. I never understood why they made one so close to the Ang Lee effort. Of course I'm biased, it had Aussie Eric Bana as the Hulk. I'm a huge Edward Norton fan but couldn't help thinking this one is going to be part of something bigger, maybe a Marvel superhero blockbuster. Not bad tho.

  2. Tomorrow is suposse to be the release day of Mega Shark vs Big Ass Octopus...eeeeeeeeeeee....I feel like its the night before Crapmas. (see what I did there?) And I have been recommending great movies and you watch these. Though Hulk was good.

  3. Aw man, has there ever been a good sasquatch movie? Someone's really gotta get that subgenre going.

  4. Baino: Yeah, I am guessing they wanted one more in the vein of the "X-Men" and "Iron Man" films.

    Cal: Looking forward to "Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus", even though I haven't been hearing great things. And I will get to "Legends of the Fall", just that the Netflix queue is so backed up!

    Phronk: Yeah, I hear ya. I think the last "Bigfoot" I was really freaked out by was the one they spotlighted on the old "In Search Of..." with Leonard Nimoy.

  5. I liked last year's "Incredible Hulk" as well. As for Ang Lee's "Hulk", if you haven't seen it, count yourself among the lucky ones.

  6. Yo, Wings, I got the link you sent me for "Frank N. Stein Does His Thingy." I can't thank you enough. I'm about to write my sister to see if she by chance has my old pin. I have a suspicion she may be "The Slacker," but I know I'll never get the truth out of her, one way or the other. Peace, man. (Word verification= "grade" )

  7. Halloween Spirit: Okay, I will consider myself lucky, then!

    Mr. Beautiful: Sisters!